Life With Love
The
greatest example of love in the entire history of the human race was the love
God manifested in the giving of his only begotten Son for the sins of the
world. “For God so loved the world, that
he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not
perish, but have everlasting life. For
God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world
through him might be saved” (John
The
Christian’s love for one another originates from the love we have seen of God
and of his Son. The apostle John wrote:
“Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and everyone who loves
is born of God, and knows God. He who
loves not does not know God; for God is love” (1 John 4:7-8). Later in that same chapter, the inspired
writer expanded on what I have just read to you. “And we have known and believed the love that
God has to us. God is love; and he who dwells in love dwells in God, and God in
him. Herein is our love made perfect,
that we may have boldness in the day of judgement: because as he is, so are we
in the world. There is no fear in love;
but perfect love casts out fear: because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love.”
Please listen carefully to this simple but powerful statement. “We love him, because he first loved us,” (1
John
The greatest treatise on love in existence tells us what it would be like to live without love. “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as a sounding brass, or a tinkling symbol. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not love, it profits me nothing” (1 Cor. 13:1-3). Can you think of a greater tragedy than to live without love? But what does it really mean to live with love? I shall address that question in our study today.
As
you know from your study of the Bible, it does not offer any definitions,
although the context often helps us to know the meaning of words. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 does not provide a
definition of love, but it does tell us how love behaves. If you love someone, you are going to be
longsuffering. The word “longsuffering”
comes from a Greek word that literally means of a long mind. Dr. Hugo McCord renders the Greek “love waits
patiently.” The apostle Peter uses the
same word of God almighty. “The Lord is
not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is
longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish, but that all
should come to repentance” (2 Pet. 3:9).
What if God were as “short-suffering” to us, to coin a word, as we are
with one another? When we rebel against
him, he would simply wipe us off the face of the earth. God threatened to punish the Israelites if
they did not repent of their gross immorality.
He then said to them through Malachi: “For I am the Lord, I change not;
therefore you sons of Jacob are not consumed” (Mal. 3:6). We should be eternally grateful that God does
not lose patience with us each time we sin against him. Paul uses the same Greek word--the verb
form--when he exhorted the Thessalonians: “Now we exhort you, brethren, warn
them who are unruly, comfort the fainthearted, support the weak, be patient
toward all men” (1 Thess,
What
would this quality of love do for marriages and families in the
Paul
tells us that the love that Christians are to cultivate toward all others,
including one’s enemies, is kind. The
Greek word translated “kind” is chrestotes
and means graciousness, moral goodness, integrity or benignity. Paul lists this quality of love as one
characteristic of the fruit of the Spirit (Gal.
Paul
knew and we ought to know that showing kindness to some people may not be
easy. We often meet people who are
stubborn, hardheaded, angry and immoral.
Some of these people are very hard to love. But we can learn from the Lord Jesus Christ
that we must love the unlovely. Is that
not what Paul meant when he wrote: “For when we were yet without strength, in
due time Christ died for us. For
scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet perhaps for a good man some
would even dare to die. But God commends
his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for
us. Much more then, being now justified
by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if, when we were sinners, we were
reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, being reconciled, we
shall be saved by his life” (
The
King James Version reads, “love envies not.”
However, the Greek word Paul uses (zeloo)
really means “jealous.” The two
words--envy and jealousy--are very closely related. In fact, thew two Greek words are sometimes
joined together in the same context (Gal.
Paul
next uses two words that have similar meanings. “Love does not vaunt itself and
is not puffed up.” The word “vaunt”
refers to one who is vainglorious or a braggart. Can love grow in a setting where a
person--husband, father, or anyone else--is constantly bragging about his
knowledge, skill or accomplishments? We
may endure the bragging of a politician, although such behavior ought to be
offensive to good people, but such an attitude in an intimate relationship is
destructive. Most of us tire of people
who constantly tell us how practically perfect they are and what they have done
for the human race. Such people need to
be reminded of a fact that all of us know.
“For all have sinned and continually come short of the glory of God”
(Rom.
The
second word used in this verse is Greek phusioo
that means to be puffed up like a bellows.
The word appears only seven times in the New Testament. It ought to be meaningful to every student of
the Bible that six of the seven times the word phusioo is used in the New Testament it is used in 1
Corinthians. Some of the Corinthians
were puffed up because they had been blessed with the supernatural gifts of the
Spirit. Paul asked them, “For who makes
you to differ from another? And what do
you have that you did not receive? Now
if you received it, why do you glory, as if you had not received it” (1 Cor.
4:6-7)? The church members were puffed
up--probably not because of but in spite of--having an incestuous brother in
the fellowship of the church (1 Cor. 5:2).
It ought to be obvious that God’s people--either in their personal relationships
or in their work for the Lord--cannot be filled with love and be puffed
up. I wonder if the Corinthians knew and
I wonder if we know that “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit
before a fall” (Prov.
Love “does not behave itself in unseemly ways.” The New American Standard Bible renders the Greek, love “does not act unbecomingly.” Did President Clinton act unbecomingly when he engaged in sexual promiscuity with Monica Lewinsky and with other women and then lied to cover up his transgressions? Did Jesse Jackson behave in unseemly or indecent ways when he fathered a child out-of-wedlock and would not admit it until DNA proved he was the father of the child? Do men act unbecomingly when they get drunk and embarrass their wives and children? Do women behave in unseemly ways when they gamble away the money their families need? No one truly loves when he or she brings shame on those they are supposed to love--their family members, their fellow church members or others.
Virtually every marriage counselor in our country will admit to you that selfishness destroys many marriage relationships. I remember reading an interview between a newspaper reporter and a prominent writer on family relationships. The reported asked the writer: “What in your judgment is the biggest problem in marriage.” The answer should not surprise anyone. The writer responded with just one word: “Selfishness.” Everyone knows or ought to know just how destructive selfishness is. Selfishness demands that I have my way in all matters. Such an attitude is the very opposite of love. The King James Version reads: Love “seeks not her own.” The New Revised Standard Version reads: Love “does not insist on its own way.” The New English Bible says that love is “never selfish.”
The
Lord Jesus Christ is the greatest example of unselfishness the human race could
ever know. Two passages from Paul’s
epistles make that truth so plain no one can miss it. “For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus
Christ, that, though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, that you
through his poverty might be rich” (2 Cor. 8:9). “Let nothing be done through strife or
vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than
himself. Look not every man on his own
welfare, but every man also one the welfare of others. Let this mind be in you, which was also in
Christ Jesus: who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal
with God: but made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a
What if every husband and every wife had the unselfish attitude expressed in the verses I have just read to you? If your spouse always sought your welfare and not just his or her own, would you ever want to divorce such a person? Tragically, many of us are like the man who prayed: “Lord, bless me and my wife, my son John and his wife; us four and no more.” Very few of us would admit to being that selfish, but we show by our actions that we are. Paul expresses the attitude all Christians ought to cultivate. “Let no man seek his own, but every man another’s welfare... Even as I please all men in all things, not seeking my own profit, but the profit of many, that they may be saved” (1 Cor 10:24, 31). Should not local churches also follow Paul’s inspired advice?
The King James Version reads: Love “is not easily provoked.” The word “easily” does not appear in the original. The translators added the word to try to make simpler the point Paul was emphasizing. But adding the word “easily” softens and compromises the truth of the passage. The word “provoked” in this context means irritation or sharpness of spirit. Dr. J. B. Phillips renders the Greek: Love is not touchy. I am not telling you that Christians are not tempted to be irritable under some circumstances, but we must work at being patient, as Paul has already taught in this great passage on love. When we do become touchy in dealing with others, we need to apologize for our lack of love and understanding.
Paul argues that love “thinks no evil.” The Greek verb translated “thinks” means to add up, to keep an account of, as in a ledger book. If our spouses or friends sin against us, we are not to keep an account of those sins. We are to be ready and eager to forgive and wipe the slate clean, just as God does when we repent of our sins against him. The apostle Peter asked Jesus, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Until seven times seven?” Jesus replied: “I say not unto you, Until seven times seven: but, Until seventy times seven” (Mt. 18:21-22). Did Jesus literally mean “seventy times seven” or 490? Seventy times seven means an unlimited number. We forgive so long as our spouse or neighbor or fellow church member repents and asks for forgiveness. When we forgive, we do not keep reminding the person of his or her past sins. When we forgive, that means the person’s sins are gone forever.
Love does not rejoice in iniquity. Does Paul mean that Christians should not take pleasure in the tragedies that happen to others, especially to our enemies? When we hear of some great evil happening to ungodly persons, we are not to rejoice in their heartaches. Even though Christians have very right to support the death penalty for murderers, for rapists, for traitors and for other vicious criminals, we must never join those outside the prison walls who celebrate when the criminal is put to death. Does it bother you when you hear people shouting when some violent criminal is being executed: “Burn, baby, burn?” Love does not behave in that fashion--ever.
Love does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth. The Greek probably should be rendered “rejoices with the truth.” Does Paul have in mind rejoicing when men and women tell the truth? Our national leaders should set the example of telling the truth--always telling the truth. But if many of them told the truth all the time, would they not be thrown out of office? When a government leader is caught in a lie, his constituents ought to demand his resignation. If he will not correct his grievous blunder, he ought to be impeached, even if he claims to have improved the economy and kept us from international conflicts. As Americans--especially as Christians--we must always rejoice in the truth and never allow lies to go uncorrected.
But maybe Paul also means preaching and supporting the truth of God’s word. After all, the word of God is the truth. Jesus prayed for his immediate disciples and for us: “Sanctify them through they truth: thy word is truth” (John 17:17). Should not Christians rejoice--always rejoice--when the truth of God’s word is laid out plainly, simply and forcefully? And should we not grieve when the truth is compromised for the sake of weak and sinful church members?
The love that has God’s approval “bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things and endures all things.” The word “bears” means to offer a covering for. Peter affirmed: “Love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Pet. 4:8). The word “believes” must not be construed as meaning that Christians should be gullible. But we should put the very best interpretation on all reports, especially when we are not sure of their veracity. Love hopes all things, that is, it always sees the bright side of life. The word “endures” means to persevere. Christians do not give up when the going gets tough. We keep on doing what is good.
Paul adds to this list of qualities of love, “Love never fails.” He concluded his discussion of love by saying, “Now abides faith, hope and love; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Cor. 13:13). May God help each of us to cultivate love in our lives!
Winford Claiborne
The International Gospel Hour
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